Friday, December 18, 2009

The Difficulty of Getting What You Wanted

I'm in a difficult place right now. I am so excited for this baby and all the possibilities that it can be, but I find myself hesitant to write because I know some of you are longing for what I am experiencing now. I know that all to well, I longed for 3 years for this blessing. It is still hard to believe. So shouting it from the hilltops in this venue has been a difficult thing for me because I know. I know some of you won't read this blog anymore because it hurts to see someone else getting pregnant instead of you...again. I know you struggle with trying to stay positive and not get bitter and wonder, "why not me?"

I want you to know I won't hold it against you if you stop reading or visiting. I understand--I have done it myself. Know that I will still be praying for you that you too can experience the joy of seeing those two lines. Oh how I long for that for all of my fellow infertles!

I know I will still be visiting you and encouraging you because I know you need it. We all do no matter what we are going through. I will always be a part of this community that has been such a huge part of my life. I don't know what I would have done had it not been for this family. You mean so much to me.
I must keep writing about where I am at at this very moment--trying to survive until second trimester. It hasn't been too fun yet! But the joy I have is amazing and I must let it out! I can't contain it, and I am sure it will spill out.

Stay strong and keep praying! God is in the business of miracles! I am living proof!

5 comments:

  1. You've waited a long time for this blessing, enjoy it. People can choose to continue to read/follow or not. But you give the rest of us hope. Enjoy your miracle!

    Happy Holidays.

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  2. This was a nice entry. I'm very happy that you got your wish. It's sweet that your still thinking of us and wishing for the best.

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  3. Hi there! Happy (early) ICLW! I'm newly pregnant as well (at 6w5d) and I was searching for bloggers that are newly pregnant as well and I happened upon yours.

    I too have struggled with the direction of my blog now that I'm pregnant. But I'm finding that my base core of loyal readers is still following along (for now) and I hope you will find the same too!

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  4. Agreed - I'm 5w3d today and glad to find others who are in the same boat. Congratulations on your bean!

    ~ICLW

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  5. This was a sweet post - thank you. I will continue to read and comment when possible, but thank you for your understanding!

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