Ouchy With a Plan

(FYI, this is TMI!)

My HSG was today. But my docs don't really call it that, they call it a saline ultrasound. They use saline and an ultrasound instead of dye. She told me that it doesn't make sense to put radioactive dye up in ya and give you a bunch of x-rays when you are trying to get pregnant. Makes sense to me too. 

So I get on the table and assume the position. HUGE, cold speculum in, then the cleaning of the cervix which felt like a pap. Unfortunately my cervix was not cooperating. She had a hard time getting through. So she had to use the speculum to try to move my uterus down since mine is anterior and almost straight up. That was not fun. I know she was trying to do it gently, but that was the worst cramps I have ever had. I have to say though, I was expecting worse. It felt like bad cramps and the bad ones went away pretty quick after it was done. She told me I may have to drink a bunch of water and fill my bladder to help things along. As soon as she said that, I started praying, "Oh Lord, make it go in! I don't want to wait. I just want to get it over with!" And then she said, "Oh! There it is!" OK, Great! Take that huge speculum out!!! I am done with that! Then the US wand with the goop and the condom on (made me laugh again) went in. I don't think I will ever get used to that!

So then she started squirting cold saline and it started pouring out-weird feeling! Fallopian tubes are clear! Praise God! BUT-to my surprise I have a uterine fibroid. Dang it-that means surgery and putting off the treatments. If I leave it in, the embryo has less surface area to adhere to. She said I may have had it all along, or all the Clomid caused it. (I knew I couldn't take that stuff unscathed!) So I need to wait, take some more tests to see if I ovulated this month (uh, probably not) then start Provera to get a period, do BCP's (birth control pills) to thin my uterine lining and have surgery June 3. Then after that, if all goes well, we will start Clomid with injectables.

I am disappointed we have to wait even longer to start treatments, but it is also nice to have a plan. I haven't had a plan in a long time-wait-probably never. It was nice to have JJ (husband) there with me. He thought he couldn't come for a second, but last night he told me he was able to make it. That would have been weird to hear I needed surgery and be alone. He is great, and so good to me. I am grateful to have him.

I recently read a book called "A Few Good Eggs" by Maureen Regan and Julie Vargo-check them out at http://www.afewgoodeggs.com/index.htm . They said something really great that stuck with me. To paraphrase, they said that you will beat infertility. I really liked that. No matter what, you will have children, whether it be from treatments or adoption, it will happen. I found that so encouraging! I recommend the book, I really liked it, and it is humorous too. That helps! We all need to laugh once in a while.